Friday, December 3, 2010
Fantasy Boyfriend/Real Deal
Think about it! The ultimate man/guy that has everything we want and need. Beautiful eyes, great butt, nice arms, oh yeah a deep and moody soul that loves to listen to The Cure...and it doesn't hurt if he has an above average cock size, and a sex drive to last through the weeks to come. Hey! A guy can dream.
All that aside we set up these standards. Rules that we make and can not break. The guy has to fit this mold. The funny part is even if the pseudo-perfect guy comes along we nit pick him and are determined to find the flaws. But how many times have we actually dated the perfect guy? Or have we always ended up with the direct opposite. As Paula Abdul put in the 90s, opposites attract. But I digress...fantasy boyfriend/real deal. That is what we are looking at here.
I hear all the stories from some of my other counterparts...looking for the fantasy boyfriend. Searching for him in every nook and cranny (in other words gay bars, dating sites that are facade for hooking up, Grindr, etc). They search far and wide. Then they meet the guy of their dreams. They go out for a couple of weeks, enjoying beautiful romantic dinners, having sex every possible minute, calling each other when ever possible. It sounds perfect right!?! It is. But then like clock work, I get the call, "he just wants too much from me. Too needy." Then the pluses come in...oh yeah the pluses. You know..."plus he hates it when I am on my phone, plus he always wants me to drive to him, plus he is older." Oh yes! The plus. It is kind of like the but and/or thing.
My friend always wonders how I meet guys and quite frankly I don't know. I am one of those that has a fantasy boyfriend, but I know my real deal. I know that yes it might be nice to have all that is pretty, but what matters most to me is what is inside. Yes, I know that sounds like some cheesy line found out of some self-help book, but it's true. And I am not saying looks aren't important, you have to be sexually/physically attracted to the person, if anything is going to work out. But don't hold someone up to be your dream/fantasy boyfriend. It isn't real.
Instead what we should be working on is the real deal bottom lines and deal breakers of what we want! Such as he should have a car, a job, a healthy mental state, his own blog maybe...have some fucking ambition! That is the real deal for me! So stop trying to fix men, or put them into this molded container that YOU created because more than likely YOU will push away someone that might be great!
If all else fails and you think I am full of shit, which I might be...feel free fuck every fantasy boyfriend, and then call me 2 weeks later! xo